i’ve been hit hard

This week has come and gone faster than I’d like it to have come and gone.  It is basically gone now.  My last day of work is tomorrow.  They are even throwing me a party with lots of food like a buffet.  That’s exciting.  But what is bitter is that I love these kids I work with.  I’ve learned their personalities so well, how exactly they like to be put to sleep, who poops and at what time haha, and practicing new skills and learning new words with them.  It’s exciting! And very stressful at times as well.  I wont miss the stress, but I’ll miss the hugs and kisses from each one of them every morning.  I didn’t think leaving this job would be as sad as I’m feeling.  I think it is because alot is changing all at once too.

I’m going from my independence as an adult in an apartment back to living under my parents’ roof.  Although I will be working full-time and out of the house alot, it will still be rough.  Maybe it would be better if we lived in the city, but no we live outside of small-town Nebraska by a cornfield.  Going from seeing my friends and living with a friend to no friends.  No friends of mine live in Milford because they’ve all moved on.  And I feel hesitant to doing all this but I know it is necessary and it has to change in order for me to get where I so long to be.

It’s going to take some time to settle back in and accept myself into where I will be at for a small time frame of my life.

What an overwhelming position I’m in.  Lord, help me get through this transition.

sadness.

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